No, don’t tell me that

No please, don’t do that. No, I can live without….and now you’ve told me. I didn’t want to know that. Can I unknow it? No because then I’ll just go out and accidentally know it again because I didn’t know I didn’t want to know what I once knew and now know again.

You know what I’m talking about don’t you? No. How could you. Unless you’re also sat at home on a Friday night with the telly on and watching Alien on Film4. Are you? You could be. But did it lead you to think the same thing I’m thinking?

Prometheus.

Not solely Prometheus.

I’m sitting here watching Alien and we get to the scene inside the Alien spacecraft. For decades we speculated about the Space Jockey. Not really knowing where he was from, how he got there, what he was doing and then Prometheus. Answering all those questions in a film that ruined the mystery and speculation. Now when you first see that ship as they approach across that barren wasteland the thing that pops in your head is….Prometheus….what a piece of shit.

This isn’t an isolated phenomenon. The horror genre is rife with destroying the mythos of it’s most nefarious of monsters with strained explanations that we really would have been better off not knowing.

Jason Goes To Hell I’m looking at you. Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare. Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers. You’re all guilty of it. Does anyone really care why the monster is the way he is. Knowing that the man is really some supernatural creature, or the monster is actually the minion of some pathetic looking beasties, while the unstoppable juggernaut has really been bouncing from one body to another. It negates that sense of horror that the character exudes.

I like not knowing.

Nothing good can come of peeking behind the curtain and learning that they’re all just puppets with someone else’s hand stuck up their arse making them do what they want them to do. It’s when you know your franchise is dwindling and you want to grab your audience by the sensitive parts and shake them up and down and say “love me again, I can be cool, watch me be cool”. But all it leads to is angry and sore individuals.

Gawwwd Highlander 5: The Source. I’d blocked you out of my brain completely but now your shit stain reveal of what and why has popped back in my brain.

Bugger.

Sooo....what are you thinking?

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